Summer Isn't Always About Relaxing: When Holiday Time Becomes Stressful

When we think of summer, we usually picture carefree days, relaxing by the sea, long evenings outdoors, and a well-earned break from everyday responsibilities. Lately, though, I've been noticing something different in my work with clients. Many bring feelings of tension, unease, and even real distress connected to summer and holiday time.

These days, we often end up talking about how exhausting a season that's supposed to bring rest can actually be. Clients tell me about the pressure to "enjoy themselves," the anxiety that comes with a sudden gap in their schedule, and the guilt they feel when a holiday doesn't relax them the way they expected. These are real, important themes, and they deserve space in a therapy conversation.

When a holiday brings more stress than relaxation

Summer often changes our everyday routine — children's schedules shift, work gets busier because colleagues are away, family expectations around a shared holiday run high, and on top of it all, social media fills up with "perfect" snapshots that can easily leave us feeling pressured and not good enough.

For many people, it's exactly this break in the daily rhythm that stirs up unease. A daily routine gives us structure and a sense of safety. Once that structure is gone, feelings of being lost, heightened anxiety, and even a sense of emptiness can surface. This hits especially hard for people already dealing with inner struggles, since it's often their everyday schedule that helps them stay balanced.

Why does routine matter so much?

Routine isn't just a list of things we do day to day. It's how we organize our lives to create a sense of predictability and control. Psychological research shows that a regular routine lowers stress, improves emotional stability, and helps us cope better with the unexpected.

When routine disappears, old questions and inner conflicts — ones that everyday busyness usually helps keep at bay — can resurface. This can be an opportunity for personal growth, but only if we have the space and support to actually face those feelings.

How can therapy help?

In therapy, we often open up questions like:

Why does relaxing make me uncomfortable?

What does it mean when I have no schedule and I'm left alone with my thoughts?

What are my own inner expectations around taking a holiday?

Why do I feel guilty for not enjoying myself the way I think I should?

In this context, therapy offers a safe space to explore these feelings without judgment, and to look for ways to build a sense of inner stability, even when the usual outside structure falls away.

It's important to let ourselves have our own experience, even when it doesn't match the "ideal" picture of a holiday. Sometimes just talking honestly about it is a relief in itself, and a first step toward enjoying summer a little more.

Online therapy: support wherever you are

In summer, online therapy has an extra advantage. Whether you're at home, away on holiday, or abroad, psychotherapy support is still available to you through secure video sessions. Online therapy lets you stay in touch with yourself and keep that continuity going, even when being physically present in the therapy room isn't possible.

Instead of a perfect holiday — time for you

If summer feels more draining than relaxing for you, you're not alone. I see this come up often in my practice, and it's a completely understandable thing to feel. Maybe summer is actually a chance to choose connection with yourself instead of a perfect holiday — without pressure or expectations. And this is exactly where therapy, in person or online, can offer you a safe space to explore and understand your own experience.